Pent up anger that I never really got out

You know what? You played me for such a long time. I gave you chance after chance after chance to be what I expected, for you to live up to my standards, and even then I had to lower them for you. You never loved me, if you would've loved me, you would've tried to give me what I want, you would've done what was best for me, and do you really think that was sitting in bed all day for an entire summer? Um, no. And I hate that you were there to share so much of my life with me. I'm really angry that you got to see that side of me and I was completely open with you, because you really didn't deserve that. You shouldn't have been there at my birthday, and you shouldn't have been there with me during the March break, and you shouldn't have met everyone in my family, because now that I think about it - I'm ashamed of you. And who wouldn't be? You have a lackluster job, you're going nowhere in life, you're chasing a childish dream in a no name town, and you're too scared to leave it. You're not attractive and you have no sell-able skills. Hmmmm. Totally boyfriend material. Like, what was I thinking? I'm just so mad at so many different things, and you have no idea. And then you have the nerve to get mad at me for one mistake? And I admit, it was big. But there are so many things that I would love to say to your face, that I would love to point out to you. If you had actually listened to me and realized my values and the things that are super important to me, instead of being so egotistical and self-centered and closed-minded, then you would've realized that I gave up SO MUCH to be with you. And you weren't willing to give up a thing. What a dick. Fuck you. I honestly hope that all of your future relationships are ruined because of the memory of me, because you promised me that they would be. Not that you ever kept your promises.

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Ughhhhhhhh, boyfriends are annoying

So, as much as I love my boyfriend, sometimes he is super annoying and he doesn't even realize it. Like today. I called him last and we made plans to go shopping so he could pick out a $100 watch I am buying for him out of the blue. It was supposed to be a surprise, but something was pissing me off and I kind of let it slip about a week ago. The plans were tentative, but he had work until 11:30, so I told him that I'd be spending the morning looking for a new camera charger (lost it), and then we'd head out. So I'd probably meet him at the station that is TRES FAR FOR ME, but the one closest to his house at 1 ish. So I call him and see if that still works, and he's like, "No, I won't be able to make it until like 4:30." THAT IS 3.5 HOURS LATER, MY LOVE. THREE AND A HALF. But fine, no, it's totally fine. Whatever. I can go shopping to buy you an expensive gift BY MYSELF. Of course, no big deal. And then after we'll go out for dinner to meet your favourite uncle in the entire universe? Cool. I'm only living at my friend's place, and have no nice clothing. But sure, whatever. Let his first impression of me be in jeans and a sweatshirt. It's totally fine. Boyfriends. They're annoying. -PB.